Dear Brother MacArthur,
When I first learned of your claim that all miracles had ceased, I was very distressed and spoke out against you quite clearly. Some have said it was because of my own personal experience with God, as if having an experience with God was something we ought not enjoy -- as though there was something wrong with experiencing God in our own little lives. Of course, this is convoluted thinking, because God has been involved in the lives of men and women since creation. So, the actual accusation, I believe, is that we seek the experience rather than God.
Here’s the thing: I haven’t been seeking the experience. No, I have been seeking God; and time and time again, He has revealed Himself dramatically.
I know that seeking tongues, etc. is something that some do. However, it was not what I was doing when I sang in tongues, had prophetic dreams, etc. Understand, I’m not saying I never sought these things; because on rare occasions, I did – though, not in earnest and not until after I had experienced them. I was not certain these things were still from God, myself, until after I experienced them. Then I realized they were as authentic as ever, meaning my experiences fit with Scripture and how God has dealt with man throughout time.
I mean that, every experience I have ever had with God is completely in line with His word. With few exceptions, they were also the result of seriously in-depth seeking on my part -- again, not seeking an experience; but rather, an answer. God was the One who decided to make that answer miraculous, not me. I just wanted an answer to my question.
Each time He responded miraculously, I was completely surprised. When I broke out in angelic song, I was so startled that I cut them off. It was beautiful, truly beautiful. I knew it was praise. It was as if every fiber of my being was elevated with His praise. I didn’t hear words in my head. I didn’t think what to say. The song just literally flowed through me. I had been praising Him and weeping for joy at His presence. Then I opened my mouth to say “thank You”, again, and this angelic song just poured out. I, literally, sat there listening and wondering whose beautiful voice I was hearing. Logically, I know it had to be me, but it sure didn’t sound like me. It was too pure, too immersed in utter adoration.
I know it happened because I had been feeling a need to worship Him more abundantly. I felt like no matter how hard I tried to phrase His praise with all the adoration I felt, I couldn’t begin come close to putting it in words. So, God assisted me. It was an incredible blessing, but it came out of a need to praise Him better. At the time I hadn’t even considered tongues.
When God spoke to me audibly, I was so startled that I stopped what I was doing and looked around. I knew in my heart it had to be Him. I’d never heard anything quite so powerful or authoritative in my life. Yet, His voice was gentle on my spirit. He made me smile from ear to ear. I simply could not stop grinning. To this day I grin spontaneously when I think of it. I just can’t help it -- this awesome God taking time for little ‘ole me.
I had never even read the Scripture (I was very young) that describes His voice as “many waters”; and yet, that is exactly how I described it when I told others. My Godly grandmother had to show me the Scripture in Revelation (1:15). I knew it was Him, but I had no idea there was proof it was Him. Again, this came in response to my speaking specifically to Him for months on end. Literally, I did little else besides speak to Him regarding a certain issue, and He responded, dramatically.
The angels I’ve seen have often frightened me at first. They can be quite intimidating. The one that met me outside an abortuary scared me half to death. I thought it was over. I thought I had done something so wrong that he had come to take me home. It wasn’t until he leaned over and smiled at me that I started breathing again. I was just that frightened.
I had been asking God to send angels to help us reach mothers for the truth of His position against abortion, but I never expected to see one. I still get a chill when I think about him. He had a huge sword and stood about 10 foot, and – boy, did he mean business. (If abortion proponents could see him, they’d never enter another clinic.) It did not even occur to me to ask God to show me the angels, but there he stood.
These are just a sampling of what I’ve experienced through the years. I don’t know about your journey with God, but mine has been full of things that can only be termed miraculous. I was miraculously called as His witness. That calling was miraculously confirmed, and I have been experiencing these things every single time I sincerely seek Him out. He never fails to respond, never.
Now, I don’t know if this makes me “charismatic” or not. If your stance is the standard for Calvinists, I’m certain I’m not one of them. But being Calvinist or charismatic or Pentecostal or whatever, has never been the issue for me. No, I want to be whatever God wants me to be and to do whatever God wants me to do. I give myself to Him and I tell Him, “You tell me. You lead me. Wherever You want me --- whatever You want of me, that is what I want”, because God is what matters to me. No offense, but I don’t care if I don’t fit your mold, because I fit God’s. He continues to move in my life and lead me, and there is plenty of evidence that it is Him in my life.
So, dear Bro. MacArthur, I wish you all the best. I really do. But I intend to continue following my Lord as He leads. I’m certain you will continue on in the path you believe to be His for you. But, let us not be enemies, dear Brother. Whatever differences there are between us, as long as we serve the same God, we are still part of the same family. It does God no service if we bicker like unregenerate siblings. No, that does the body and all watching more harm than good.
Here’s the thing: God has not been silent. Since He called me in 2001, He has been very adamant about my getting the word out to this nation. By prophetic dreams, visions, etc. He has continued to warn me and tell me to warn this people that He is very angry with us. We have forgotten Who He is. We have turned from His truth to our own will, and He is very near to leaving us to our choices.
Why do you think you have chosen this time to come against prophecy? Do you think that timing is just coincidence? I tell you the truth, dear Brother, it is not time to spurn prophecies (1The 5:20) for the proof is in the pudding. Literally, the dreams He gave me have already been partially fulfilled. Would you wait until the whole wrath is poured out? Do you really want that responsibility?
I plead with you to recant your stance, Brother MacArthur, for it is not one that you will long be pleased with. I have seen far too many of these dreams fulfilled to not know that this one stands ready. And I assure you, dear Brother, you do not want to be counted as having kept those who would have repented from doing so.
God does not lie. He may not be speaking to you in a miraculous fashion, but I urge you, dear Brother, leave room for the Spirit and be not so proud that you cannot hear.